We all like to feel special, it’s human nature, we are physiologically programmed to crave that dopamine hit. We’d all like to be remembered long after our time on Earth is up. But the fact is, most of us won’t be.
Most of us are average.
But is averageness really so bad?
(Is averageness even a word? – It is now!)
I enjoyed this article about why being average is a good thing and wanted to share my take on it, especially from my perspective as someone who supports others to follow their dreams working for themselves.
It’s OK to be Ordinary
We can’t all be famous, but we can all enjoy what we have and what we do with our time.
I’m sharing some of my favourite quotes from this article, because I couldn’t have put it better myself.
To quote: ‘Being average is a blessing, allowing you to get on with your life without worrying about who you’re impressing. You’re just free to be another human being who eats and poops and will eventually die.’
I’m a big advocate of having big dreams, doing what you love. As a mentor for micro businesses, I positively encourage it!
But it is always something you should do for YOU.
Although the one thing you can absolutely say about your business that is unique is YOU the point is not to do it simply to impress others.
Your uniqueness as a business allows you to appeal to the right audience. Not to be loved and remembered by everyone.
‘There is no reason to obsess over what other people will think of you, the blunt truth is: “Most people are too obsessed with themselves to notice. And when you realise everyone is just thinking about their own worries and concerns, you can just live your life and do your own thing. And that’s fine”.
We all also need to accept that we have limitations and can’t possibly do everything on our own.
You have neither the time, the capacity, and probably don’t have the skills. We all have things we are better at and things we are not so good at. Most of us are average at lots of things.
Being ‘self’ employed doesn’t mean you have to do everything yourself!
“Part of the problem is that we can imagine so much more than we can actually be, so we end up inhabiting the gap between our reality and our expectations and always falling short.” says Raul Aparici.
Setting realistic expectations for ourselves makes the journey towards your own version of success enjoyable, encouraging and appealing. When we aim too big and fail to put in the baby steps needed to get there, we’re setting ourselves up for failure which can give our confidence and sense of self esteem a big hit.
Your confidence and self worth comes from within. That means recognising your own talents and limitations. Not doing what everyone else expects of you in order to reinforce your own sense of worth.
However, it’s easier said than done when bombarded by other people’s judgements in this age of mass information and communication.
“Responsibility for this epidemic of self-obsession and social comparison is often leveled at the so-called snowflake generation, raised to feel they are unique and special. … a product of our highly individualistic society, which encourages us to outshine those around us.”
Your own success (whatever that means to you) is not contingent on the failure of others.
If we must attribute blame for all this contagious hubris and naval gazing – I blame individualism, neo-liberalism and Social Media for polarizing discourse.
We can’t blame young people for being the product of what we made them with our parenting and voting choices!
Take Away Tips
- Define your own success
- Compete only with the person you were yesterday
- Go easy on yourself
- Enjoy the journey instead if fixating on an imaginary destination